Month: May 2014

Trusting Daddy

/ Shannon / Leave a comment

This a repost of a blog that I posted around a year ago. It is something that I really needed to read and reflect on again.

Dear Daughters,

Chances are you won’t remember tonight, but I want you to…

Tonight didn’t go as you planned. We were heading out to something that you looked forward to. But it didn’t happen. The rain poured, time got away, and when your daddy and I looked in your eyes we saw exhaustion. Knowing the bigger picture, we knew that your plans was not what was best for you. So your daddy got back in the car, he turned the car around, and he drove. I had sat in the back with you girls that day so I wasn’t up front with him. I didn’t know what his plan was. You didn’t either. You both took turns asking “where are we going?” You sounded worried. At one point one of you said, “I’m cold, tired and confused.” Your daddy didn’t say much. I didn’t know where we were going, but I knew what to say. I said, “Just trust Daddy”. It worked for a moment, then the questions came again. You still wondered where we were going. I could understand that. I turned and looked at you said, “Your daddy cares unbelievably much, he works hard to provide and care for you every day. You can rest in that and just trust your daddy.”

It was at that moment that a small still voice whispered “Exactly”. How much more is that the case with my heavenly Father? Oh sweet daughters, at 31, I am exactly the same way with Him. There are times when I am cold, tired, confused, and I question where He is taking me. More times than I would like to admit I struggle to trust Him. Yet how much more can we trust Him? The words I spoke of your earthly father are right. He loves you truly, madly, deep, but he is an imperfect, flawed man. He has messed up, he will mess up. Even so, you know you can trust him. At your young ages, you know that you are safe with him and can rest in his love, in his provision.

Daughter, your Heavenly Father has never failed you, and never will. He has never messed up. He loves you truer, for He is Truth. He loves you more madly, for He sacrificed His own Son for you. He loves you more deeply, for He is the creator of the deepest of deeps and the highest of highs. So how much more can you trust in Him? Your earthly daddy saw your need, knew the bigger picture and acted. Our heavenly Father created us, he knows the needs we don’t even know. He sees the bigger picture. He is the bigger picture. His actions are always good.

I don’t know if you remember, but tonight you ended up at a Frozen Yogurt Place. We walked in the brightly colored room, and filled up on Triple Chocolate Ice Cream. We laughed and enjoyed a little family time. We headed home, tidied up a little, and got in bed early. The truth is, though, God doesn’t always lead us to a brightly colored Frozen Yogurt Place. There isn’t always chocolate ice cream at the end of our our confusion . But ultimately there is always something better: His Glory, Knowing him better, becoming more like him. Sweet daughter, HE is ALWAYS better than ice cream.

As the years go on, you will find yourself in this place. You will find yourself, confused. You will wonder where the road is going, why things aren’t going as you anticipated. When you do, I want you to remember tonight. I want you to remember how your earthly father saw your need, a need you didn’t want to admit you had, and he acted. I want you to remember that moment when you trusted him and rested in that. And I want you to remember how much more you can trust and rest in your Heavenly Father who loves you infinitely more than you can grasp.

Still Learning,

Momma

Who Am I?

/ Shannon / 2 Comments

Last night I sat down and did something I have never done much of before. I sat down and answered the question, “who am I?”. My entire life I have struggled to define who I am. I have never been bold or sure enough to stand up and proclaim who I am. I have identified myself by what other people have said I was-the goody-two-shoes, the responsible one, the quiet one. I have identified myself in what I was not and all the “mores’ I wanted to be- more graceful, more talented, more popular, more eloquent, more together. I have looked at myself in comparisons wanting to be prettier, skinnier, shorter, funnier, smarter, kinder, and the list went on. On the days I have glimpsed who I am, my words have been a hesitant whisper never a proclamation. Yet God is gracious and patient with me, and through His working I am beginning to answer the question with confidence. This list is not to exalt who I am but to accept who I am. So let me introduce myself….

I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

I am flawed yet a masterpiece.

I am a wife, a mommy, a friend, a daughter, a sister.

I am the answer to someone’s prayer.

I am in love with my husband.

I am a great planner and even plan to go with the flow.

I am not good at going with the flow when it doesn’t go according to plan.

I am a to-do list maker.

I am not great at follow through.

I am my 4 year old’s best buddy

I am what my 7 year old calls a “cool mom” –at least for today.

I am the fun spoiler to my 2 year old who thinks she is invincible.

I am the one who loves cooking.

I love a clean house.

I am the one who complains about the cooking and the cleaning.

I love to dance.

I am not a dancer.

I hate going against the flow and fear conflict, yet I find myself making choices that go against the flow and cause conflict.

I am not happy some days.

I am plagued with pessimism.

I am tempted with discontentment.

I am finding contentment.

I have unreasonable expectations for myself.

I want to be known, but I deeply fear being known.

I am a control freak who is reminded over and over that I am not in control.

I think puns are hilarious.

I am witty—my husband agrees though I choose to ignore the note of sarcasm in his voice.

I am scarred.

I am healed.

I am a homeschool mom who swore up and down she would never be a homeschool mom.

I am so loving be a homeschool mom.

I have laughed til it hurt.

I have cried til I couldn’t breathe.

I have walked and crawled through dark days.

I have rejoiced in this life.

I am a fan of ice cream, French fries, and bread.

I am not as healthy as I want to be.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

I have been chosen by the King of Kings.

I was the center of someone’s universe today.

I am the one that tiny feet run to in the morning.

I am my daughter’s safe place.

I fed and clothed and nurtured life today.

I am to be pointing hearts to Jesus.

I am made in the image of God.

I am humbled.

I am scared.

I am learning.

I am created.

I am undeserving.

I am redeemed, bought with a price.

I am redeemed.

I was bought with a price.

I am only now really beginning to appreciate and accept who I am.

I am exactly where He has me.

I am loved.

I am cherished.

I am His.

Who are you?

How do you answer the question?    But who has He created you to be?  Not what do others say? Or what do you wish you were?  But who are you?  You are valued, you are loved, you are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. You aren’t perfect but you are a masterpiece.  And who you are is exactly who you should be. Who you are is exactly how He wants to reveal Himself to you and those around you.